Dealing with Loneliness When Traveling as a Salesperson in Remote Mining Locations

Traveling for work is an integral part of many sales roles, particularly in industries like mining, where opportunities often lie in remote, dangerous, and far-off locations. In the early years of my career, I struggled with the loneliness that came with frequent travel. It wasn’t just about being away from home—it was the way I handled those trips that made things worse. I’d fly into a country, head straight to my hotel or the mining site, and lock myself away in my room until it was time to meet with clients or fly back home. It became a bad habit, one that made me dread these trips, and it worsened the loneliness I felt.

At the time, I had developed a warped mindset towards travel for business. I thought if I showed my family that I enjoyed my time while traveling, they might misinterpret it as me having fun while they dealt with life without me. I also feared creating a perception that these trips were like little vacations, and I wasn’t working hard. Unfortunately, this line of thinking was often encouraged by the companies I worked for, as there was always an expectation to maximize time away from the family by filling every hour with work as you are on the companies time while away from home.

It’s understandable from a business perspective—they want to reduce the cost of sales and ensure that every business trip has value. However, this unemotional and disconnected expectation on sales travellers can be very harmful to them and their family’s, especially when you’re traveling frequently. It wasn’t until I worked for a medical company who gave me a new perspective on travel, that I learned there could be a healthier balance in this job requirement. One of the first changes I made was assessing whether each trip was truly necessary. If there wasn’t a strong return on investment (ROI) or business justification, I’d decline the travel. This small shift reduced the number of times I had to put myself and my family in this emotionally taxing situation.

Where possible, we also adapted our family life. We home schooled our children and my spouse was able to work remotely thanks to the great company she works for, making it easier for them to join me on some trips. We saved diligently so that when I did travel to more interesting destinations, my spouse or the entire family could come along. I recognize that this isn’t an option for every family. Many of the locations I travelled to were too dangerous or logistically challenging to bring anyone with me.

That’s when I made the final change in how I approached these trips and mitigating loneliness. Instead of isolating myself in a hotel room and trying not to create any misconceptions, I began planning my travels with my family in a more inclusive way. We would discuss where I was going, what I needed to do, and what free time I might have. Together, we’d research the destination and find interesting places I could visit during my downtime—places that wouldn’t interfere with my business meetings but would allow me to bring a healthy work life balance to my travel.

When the trip began, I documented everything. From the moment I left the airport to the journey to the hotel and everywhere in-between and back to the airport, I’d take pictures, record videos, and send voice notes to my family. Rather than sitting in my room and replying to emails in isolation, I’d explore the sights we had agreed on as a family and find nice and interesting places to sit and do work when necessary. Then, during our daily video calls, I’d show them all the interesting things I’d seen and answer their questions from the new things I had learnt that day. It turned these once-dreaded trips into something exciting for all of us, even though I was the only one physically there.

This mind shift and activity drastically reduced the stress of loneliness for both myself and my family. It transformed each trip from a burden into an adventure we shared together. It kept me busy in a healthy way and helped me avoid sitting in my hotel room, marinating in loneliness. By finding a balance between work and family life while traveling, I discovered that it’s possible to be a traveling salesperson without losing that essential connection with the people I love.

The Impact on the Salesperson

As a salesperson visiting remote mining locations, isolation is often inevitable. These places are far from home, and sometimes, they’re isolated in every sense—physically, emotionally, and socially.

5 Types of Loneliness You May Feel:

1. Geographical Loneliness – Being far from home, in unfamiliar and often dangerous locations, can amplify feelings of isolation.
2. Social Loneliness – Without your regular social network, the absence of familiar faces can lead to a deep sense of detachment.
3. Emotional Loneliness – Missing the emotional support from family and loved ones, which can’t always be filled by phone calls alone.
4. Professional Loneliness – The lack of daily interaction with colleagues and the sense of working in isolation can create a disconnection from your team.
5. Existential Loneliness – Long periods away from home can cause you to question the purpose and value of your work, especially if it takes a toll on your personal life.

5 Ways to Manage and Reduce Your Loneliness:

1. Stay Engaged with Loved Ones – Make time for regular video calls and share your experiences with your family, so they feel involved in your journey.
2. Create a Routine – Develop a routine that includes personal activities like reading, exercise, or exploring the local area.
3. Document Your Adventures – Share photos, videos, or voice notes with your family to keep them connected to your travels.
4. Engage in Local Culture – Try to connect with locals or colleagues to foster a sense of belonging, even in temporary surroundings.
5. Prioritize Mental Health – Practice mindfulness, meditation, or journaling to stay grounded and reduce feelings of emotional loneliness.

The Impact on the Spouse

Being a spouse of a traveling salesperson is challenging. The emotional and physical absence of your partner can create stress, overwhelm, and isolation.

5 Types of Loneliness Your Spouse May Feel:

1. Partner Loneliness – Missing the daily companionship and support you provide.
2. Parental Loneliness – Shouldering the responsibility of managing the household and children alone.
3. Decision-Making Loneliness – Making major decisions without your immediate input can feel daunting and isolating.
4. Physical Loneliness – The absence of your physical presence can leave your spouse feeling emotionally distant.
5. Social Loneliness – Without you, your spouse may feel excluded from social gatherings that involve couples or partners.

5 Ways Your Spouse Can Manage and Reduce Loneliness:

1. Stay Connected – Regular video calls can help maintain a sense of closeness and emotional support.
2. Build a Support Network – Encourage your spouse to spend time with friends, family, or support groups to ease the burden of isolation.
3. Engage in Personal Activities – Having hobbies, exercise routines, or social events can fill the emotional gap when you’re away.
4. Share Feelings Openly – Keep an open line of communication, allowing your spouse to express any concerns or emotions.
5. Plan for the Future – Looking forward to a family trip or a planned break can help maintain optimism during your time away.

The Impact on Children

Children feel the absence of a parent acutely, and without fully understanding why you’re away, they may experience a range of emotions from insecurity to loneliness.

5 Types of Loneliness Children Feel When You’re Away:

1. Separation Loneliness – Missing your daily presence and the comfort it provides.
2. Playmate Loneliness – Missing the fun and bonding activities you would normally share.
3. Emotional Loneliness – Feeling unable to share certain emotions or thoughts because you’re not physically there.
4. Security Loneliness – Lacking the sense of security that comes from having both parents at home.
5. Routine Loneliness – The absence of regular routines, like bedtime stories or weekend outings, can leave a void.

5 Ways to Help Your Children Manage Loneliness:

1. Create Interactive Check-ins – Video calls that involve activities, like reading or playing games, can help them feel closer to you.
2. Leave Surprises – Hiding small notes or gifts for them to find while you’re away can create a sense of presence even in your absence.
3. Reassure Them Often – Remind them regularly that you’re coming back and that you miss them too.
4. Involve Them in Your Trip – Share stories or photos to make them feel connected to your travels.
5. Maintain Their Routine – Keeping their daily routine stable helps minimize the emotional disruption caused by your absence.

How Companies Can Help Salespeople and Families Deal with Loneliness

Companies play a crucial role in reducing the loneliness experienced by their traveling employees and their families.

5 Ways Companies Can Assist:

1. Offer Flexible Travel Schedules – Allowing more flexibility in travel schedules can reduce the emotional strain on both the employee and their family.
2. Provide Mental Health Resources – Offering counseling services for both the salesperson and their family can help them manage the emotional challenges of travel.
3. Encourage Family-Friendly Travel – In certain cases, offering the option for family members to accompany the salesperson can ease feelings of loneliness.
4. Promote Work-Life Balance – Encouraging employees to take time off after extended travel can help them reconnect with their family.
5. Host Family Support Programs – Workshops or support groups for spouses and children can provide emotional support and help them manage the challenges of frequent travel.

Final Thoughts

Loneliness from frequent travel is an emotional challenge that many salespeople and their families face, particularly in industries like mining. But as I’ve learned over time, there are ways to reduce its impact. By being mindful and proactive, it’s possible to transform what could be a burden into an opportunity to stay connected and even enrich your family’s life. Whether it’s exploring the world virtually with your children or involving your spouse in your journey, the key is finding balance. Loneliness doesn’t have to dominate the traveling life—it can be managed, and you can keep your mental health and family relationships strong.

References:

• • Weiss, R. S. (1973). Loneliness: The Experience of Emotional and Social Isolation. This classic text outlines different types of loneliness and their emotional effects.
  • Peplau, L. A., & Perlman, D. (Eds.) (1982). Loneliness: A Sourcebook of Current Theory, Research, and Therapy. A foundational book discussing various forms of loneliness, including emotional and social loneliness.
  • Bowlby, J. (1980). Attachment and Loss: Sadness and Depression. A major work in attachment theory, relevant to understanding separation loneliness in children.
  • Holt-Lunstad, J., Smith, T. B., & Layton, J. B. (2010). Social Relationships and Mortality Risk: A Meta-analytic Review. Published in PLoS Medicine, this research shows the critical importance of social connections to well-being, particularly relevant to the effects of loneliness on mental health.
  • Brown, B. (2012). Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead. A well-known book on vulnerability and connection, providing insights into emotional loneliness and how to manage it.
  • Sherry Turkle (2011). Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other. This explores how technology both helps and hinders emotional connection in modern life, particularly relevant to long-distance communication strategies.
  • Maslach, C., & Leiter, M. P. (2016). Burnout: The Cost of Caring. Discusses how work-related stress and isolation can lead to emotional burnout, which ties into the experience of loneliness while traveling for work.